I really don’t even know where to start. There are probably 15 drafts in my folder- pieces begun with good intentions, but that died the classic literary death. See, I have a problem. It goes like this- I get hit with an idea or an epiphany and so I start to explore it and write it out, but then after editing and overthinking it literally to death, I discard it, wondering why I ever thought it was a good idea to start with. So I’m intentionally keeping this light and chatty, with the hopes that I can get back into the discipline of writing.
A lot of life has happened in the past year; big, life-changing experiences and also little mundane ordinary moments that compose life’s rhythm. I bought a house, turned 30, started a new job, lost a beloved grandpa, and toured Italy. This year has been hard but the morning sunlight faithfully danced across my plant collection, and the steadiness of God acquired new dimensions in a year of change. Leo Tolstoy was right: “All the beauty of life is made up of light and shadows.”
I suppose I’m feeling particularly melancholy because I just finished my annual reading of “The Hawk and Dove Trilogy.” I always feel a familiar tightening and dread as I approach the end because the ending is so gutting. I always end up in tears because it is so achingly beautiful but sad. I cannot recommend this book highly enough, please go read it already! This particular reading became especially meaningful since we got to experience a Benedictine monastery in Tuscany. The monks at the Abbey of Monte Oliveto Maggiore are white-robed and their abbey is quite extravagantly decorated with beautifully old and even scandalous paintings which contrasted starkly with my book monk-friends whose lives were defined by strict poverty and simplicity. I suppose even the Benedictine order is allowed to change a bit from the 1300s to now 🙂
It is hard to know just what all to write. I find it rather surprising that at the ripe old age of 30, I have less of life figured out than I did at 25. You know how it goes, you start your 20’s with all of life’s answers and with the confidence and zeal to change the world. And then you actually hit real life and those neatly packaged theories don’t fit into reality very well at all. So I’ve been revisiting some of those beliefs and theories and feel about 3 months old in some ways.
I’m hoping to continue writing, especially with long, winter evenings coming up. To all of my new readers, “hello, and welcome to this space!” I hope to offer up posts more regularly and you can keep me accountable 🙂
So, what would you like to hear?
A Detailed Account of our Trip to Italy
A Series on Being A Young Homeowner and Ways I Save Money
Deeper Stuff Like How I Think Christians Have A Problem With Spiritual Out-Sourcing
or More Chill Stuff Like How To Make the Best Curry In The World (where i’d have to get my sister RuthAnne’s recipe)
Drop me a comment and let me know!